Never Let Go
by SkyGem
Summary: There are three kinds of people who keep secrets. Those who don't want to be reminded of what's in the depth of their heart. Those who want to say it, but can't, and those who hope that someone will ask them what they are hiding.
1. Chapter 1

DemonicEmbrace: Hey all! Okay, I decided to do this story quite a while ago with I heart Manga and Anime, but she hasn't been replying to any of my PMs lately, so I decided to post it on my account. This is the first chapter that was posted on her account and I'll try to get the next chapter out as soon as possible. Please review and tell me what you think!

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Prince of Tennis, but, any OCs that you encounter along the way (which you probably won't) probably do belong to me.

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**Akaya, Age 5**

I ran fast, through the forest, searching for my parents. "Mommy? Daddy!" I called tearfully. "Where are you?" I was starting to get really scared. I had come with my parents into the forest behind my house, eager to explore, but had somehow gotten separated from them. Still searching for them, I eventually saw a faint glow up ahead, and I ran to it, thinking it was the backyard of my house.

I ran out into the bright light, but saw that it wasn't my house, it was a clearing, and I was heading straight toward a huge pond! I tried to stop, but I was running too fast, and my momentum carried me right into the pond. Splashing wildly as my lungs filled with water, I tried to make my way up to the surface, but, no matter how hard I tried, I kept sinking. By now, my lungs were burning, and I was fighting to stay conscious, but, I just couldn't get back to the surface, my vision started to black out, and I was slowly losing consciousness.

Just as I was losing hope, a shadow swam into my field of vision, and two warm hands encircling my wrists. That was the last thing I noticed, as I blacked out soon after.

When next I awoke, I was lying on the grass, not far from the pond. I slowly opened my eyes, and saw a boy standing over me, looking down. He had short, wild, greenish-black hair, and the most startlingly pretty eyes I had ever seen. They were amber in color, and looked incredibly worried. When I opened my eyes, his pretty face lit up in relief, making him look like a girl.

"Are you okay?" asked the pretty boy.

I opened my mouth, and was somehow able to choke out a quiet, "Yes."

He smiled brightly, and said, "Thank goodness! You almost drowned!"

"Were you the one who pulled me out?" I asked.

He nodded, and it seemed he was about to say more, when my parents burst out of the trees, looking worried. "Akaya!" shouted my mother as soon as she saw me. She came up to me and hugged me fiercely. "Oh, don't you ever wander off like that again! You have no idea how worried we were!"

I smiled weakly at her, and said, "I'm fine, mom." I then turned my head to look for the pretty boy who had pulled me out of the water, but he was nowhere to be seen.

"Akaya?" asked my father worriedly. "Are you okay?"

I turned to smile at him, forgetting the other boy. "I'm fine, papa."

* * *

**11 Years Later**

"I'm home!" I called as I walked into the apartment I shared with my father.

I was walking to my bedroom, when my father suddenly appeared before me, and the next second, my cheek was stinging, and my father looked furious. "Where have you been?" he asked.

"I was at tennis practice!" I said, holding the side of my face that he had slapped.

"Haha! Tennis practice? Don't lie to me! Today's a Sunday! You don't have tennis practice on Sundays!"

"Well, we do now, because of the upcoming tournament!" I said, trying not to provoke him.

"Whatever," he said, turning around and seeming to forget my existence. I continued on my way to my room, and luckily got there before my father could blame me for something else that wasn't my fault.

When I got to my room, I shut the door behind me, and threw my bag on my bed. I was about to sit down, when I saw that something had fallen out of one of the pockets on my bag. Picking it up, I saw that it was a picture of me and my mother, just before she had died. Sighing, I thought back to those happy days. Those days when my mother was still around, and my father was still the kind, caring man I looked up to.

My mother had died when I was seven, after saving me from getting hit by a car when I had walked out onto the road, trying to get my ball back. That was when my father had changed. He had loved my mother very much, and blamed me for her death. After the funeral, he had started drinking, and would never leave the house. Eventually, he got fired from his job, and we fell into debt. As soon as I was old enough, I got a job to help support us, and thanks to that, we were just barely getting by. After a while, my father got a little better, he started working again, but he never seemed to forgive me. He would get mad at me for the smallest things, and he hadn't smiled at all since the funeral.

I felt something trickle down my face, and when I put my hand up to catch it, I saw that I was crying. I hadn't cried in years, but these memories were too painful to be able to keep them back.

Suddenly, I heard a ping, and opened my phone to see that I had a text message. I didn't recognize the number, so I decided to just delete it. I switched off my phone and put it away. About half an hour later, I was doing my homework, when I got another text. Seeing that it was from the same person as before, I deleted it again.

This repeated about two more times, until finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I picked up my phone, and opened the text, wondering what would be so important that they would keep bothering me.

I was surprised-and really irritated-to see that all the text said was "Hi! Wanna be my textmate?"

Irritated, I typed back a reply, "Who the hell are you, and why do you keep texting me?"

Within minutes, I got a reply saying, "I am a lost soul, looking for a friend. Please be an angel, and save me from this loneliness."

For some reason, this message struck a cord, and I felt the need to reply. "Why did you even choose me? Do I know you?"

Again, the reply was quick in coming. "I didn't choose you, it was fate. I just shuffled the last four digits of my number. My name is Echizen Ryoma, who are you?"

"I am Kirihara Akaya. Why don't you call one of your friends, instead of bothering me?"

"I don't have any friends, I am forever isolated from my peers. Will you be my friend?"

I was tempted to say no, but for some reason, I just couldn't, so, I replied with, "Yes. It is nice to meet you, Ryoma."

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DemonicEmbrace: Well, that's the end of chapter one! Please don't forget to review and tell me what you thought! Well, until next time, farewell!


	2. Chapter 2

After changing out of my tennis clothes, I took out my cell phone and saw I had another text from Ryoma. This brought a smile to my face.

_How was tennis practise?  
__-Ryoma_

Over the past week, Ryoma and I had been messaging each other a lot, getting to know each other. He was really fun to talk to.

_Meh. It was okay. What did you do today?  
__-Akaya_

He always replied within moments. It made me a bit suspicious, but not enough to make me ask. I had promised not to pry too much.

_Nothing much. Sleeping mostly.  
__-Ryoma_

This made me really curious. It was always the same response. I'd asked him before why he didn't go to school. He just changed the subject. After that, we fell into our routine, talking about different stuff. Books we'd read, movies we'd seen, people we knew. The days went on, and the more we texted each other, the closer we became. Before long, every time my phone beeped, my heart sped up and I became excited, hoping it was him.

One day, a few weeks after we first started texting each other, he said something weird.

_Keep me as a friend and I will keep you in my heart. Lock it up and throw away the key so that no one can ever take you away from me.  
__-Ryoma_

I don't know what came over me then. Maybe I finally realized what was going on with my heart, but I replied with:

_In life, we seldom find a person we love truly with all our hearts. If you were to ever find that one, hold on and never let go, value that person 'cause they're life's greatest gift, worth holding onto with the intention of never letting go...  
__-Akaya_

When his reply came, it sent shivers down my spine.

_Value the people who have touched your life because you will never know just when they will walk out of your life and never come back again.  
-Ryoma_

I didn't understand what I felt then, but about one thing I was sure. I could not pass a day without messaging him. I'd become used to talking to him, even though we hadn't met in real life. It amazed, and to an extent scared, me what a large part of my life he had become. Even when my father abused me, all the pain could disappear with just one word from Ryoma.

_Don't come close if later you'll just pass by; don't touch me if later you'll just let me cry; don't love me if later you'll just leave me and won't stay...  
__-Akaya_

Apparently my conversations with Ryoma had turned me into a hopeless romantic. I would never say these kinds of things in real life but there was something about Ryoma, something that made me want to tell him everything about me. With every message that was sent, I fell deeper and deeper in love with this guy I had never even met before in real life. After that conversation, our texts had a certain intimacy to them. Were anyone else to read our texts, the first conclusion they would come to would be that we were a couple. If they were to look closely, though, they would notice that there was a certain distance between us, a gap that would never be bridged. Even though we were so close, we were far away. And though we knew everything about each other, at the same time, we knew nothing at all.

Then, everything changed on a certain December night.

_Though we are miles apart, you are always in my heart. I close my eyes, and there you are. Even if the day I see you never comes, I'll always be here to care for you, far longer than forever…  
__-Ryoma_

By this time, we had been exchanging texts for months, and even though we had never met before in real life, the bond between us was unbreakable.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder…I had always thought that to be a stupid quote, that absence would only make you love someone less. Oh, how wrong I was. Not ever seeing Ryoma intensified my feelings for him so much, I felt I must burst from the strength of it.

I replied immediately.

_Loving you secretly is a hard thing for me to do, wondering whether you will feel the same way too. But I can't read your mind, I don't know the contents of your heart, though Kami-sama knows how hard I've tried. But whatever you hide in there, I'll still be loving you.  
__-Akaya_

I held my breath as I waited for his reply. When it came, I felt as if I would suddenly start jumping around for the joy of it, for this is what he had said:

_How I wish I could really tell you how much you mean to me, but I'm afraid to love. I fear the day my beloved hurts me, and yet, I fear more the day my beloved is hurt because of me. A terrible person I must be, for though the better part of me prays for the day you stop loving me, the stronger part prays that day should never come. For then, surely, I shall lose all hope to live…  
__-Ryoma_

This one text made me feels so many emotions, the strongest of them being elation. I was so incredibly happy that he cared for me as I did for him, and yet, I felt upset that he should pray for the day I stopped loving him, even if it was for my own good.

Not thinking about what I was doing, I told him what exactly was on my mind.

_The reason I met you is because of this red thread of destiny, tied so firmly to my finger. But if this thread were to break and you were taken by someone else, I would retie it as many times as it would take for you to be mine again.  
__-Akaya_

After that, the distance between us, it seemed, had disappeared. I was in bliss, but short did that bliss last.

Just a few days before Christmas, he stopped sending me messages. I began to feel worried. Something just kept bothering me...I couldn't understand what it was, but it made me feel incredibly nervous. I tried to call him once, but he wouldn't answer. Nevertheless, I continued sending messages. Those days felt so miserable, so empty. I didn't want to lose him. Then, the day before Christmas eve, I heard my phone's message tone again. Quickly checking the number, I saw that is was from him! I read greedily the words, devouring them in seconds.

_Oftentimes we say goodbye to the one we love without wanting to. Though that doesn't mean that we stop loving them or we stopped caring. Sometimes, GOODBYE is a painful way to say I LOVE YOU.  
__-Ryoma_

I was dumfounded. I didn't know what to think of it. What did he mean? I texted him back, searching for answers, but found nothing. I called him but again, he wouldn't answer.

I wanted to be with him forever, but now I felt I would lose him without ever having truly known him.

That night, I could not sleep. I stayed awake, staring at my ceiling, pondering his message. Slowly, around midnight, I drifted into a fitful sleep.

The next morning, the morning of Christmas eve, my cell beeped again, waking me from my nightmares. It was him!

_Meet me at TenniPuri national park at 10 am today.  
__-Ryoma_

As I hurriedly changed my clothes, a hundred things were running through my mind. Did his message last night mean nothing at all? Had I overreacted to it?

Soon, these thoughts were pushed out as I turned my mind to the meeting ahead. I would finally be able to meet Ryoma!

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DemonicEmbrace: What did you guys think? Yes, yes I know. Everyone was incredibly OOC, and I'm sorry, but there was no way I could keep them IC! This fic is actually base largely on a love story I found online years ago and though quite a few quotes were taken from the story, a lot of them were also made up by me. I'll post a link to the story on my profile after this fic is done. I wouldn't want to reveal any spoilers XDD. Anyways, please leave a review and I'll update asap. ^_^


	3. Chapter 3

When I arrived at the entrance to the park, I saw a boy about my age there. When he saw me, a small smile graced his lips and I immediately knew he was Ryoma. He had beautifully gold eyes, deep and expressive, his skin was pale as snow and his mass of black, green-tinted hair was adorably messy. His face was pixie-like and he could have easily been mistaken for a girl. He was wearing only a light sweater and jeans, as the weather wasn't all that cold. Something about him seemed familiar to me, but I shook it off and walked up to him.

"Ryoma?" I asked.

Nodding slightly, he smiled a little wider and said, "It's nice to finally meet you, Akaya." His voice was a little higher than average, but not at all shrill. Just from hearing it, you could easily tell he was a guy.

I grinned back and held my hand out to him. Hesitatingly, he took it, holding it lightly.

His touch gave me shivers and I had butterflies in my stomach. We walked together in silence for a while, looking around at the bare trees.

Suddenly, Ryoma stopped and I looked at him quizzically, but he wasn't looking at me. He was staring over at a cute little coffee that was currently pretty full. There was a sign in the window that they were selling hot chocolate half price today. He was practically drooling.

Letting out a small chuckle, I tugged lightly on his hand, heading in the direction of store.

"Two hot chocolates, please," I said to the man that was selling them.

While we were waiting for the hot chocolate, the man said to us, "You two make a beautiful couple."

As Ryoma blushed beside me, I took said, "Why, thank you."

After we had paid, I steered the still blushing Ryoma towards one of the tables and sat him down, handing him his cup.

As soon as the cone was in his hands, he snapped out of it and his eyes lit up like a child's.

Taking a small slip, his eyes closed and he smiled happily.

Then, looking up at me, he said, "Thank you."

After that, we talked about a lot of different stuff, just as if we were having one of our normal phone conversations, and before I knew it, it was already late into the night. The two of us had spent the day shopping and just hanging out, like a normal date.

I was walking Ryoma home when he stopped in front of a huge, lit up Christmas tree in the middle of a crowded shopping plaza. Looking up at the tree, he said absently, "They told me I would never live to be fifteen." Then, turning his head to look at me, he smiled mysteriously and said, "But here I am, spending my fifteenth birthday in the company of the person most important to me in this world."

"Wouldn't live to be fifteen?" I asked, completely ignoring the last part of his statement. "What do you mean-?"

He cut me off by suddenly leaning in close and kissing me quickly on the lips.

When he pulled away, I could see that there were tears in his eyes.

"Ryoma?" I asked, putting a hand on his cheek to make him look at me. "What's wrong?" I asked.

Backing away slowly, he suddenly turned around and disappeared into the crowd.

"Ryoma!" I called, trying to run after him. I searched and searched, but there were too many people, I had lost him.

I tried calling him, but he wouldn't pick up. I tried messaging him, but he wouldn't respond.

In the end, with a frustrated sigh, I headed home, but not before sending him one more text.

A little more than a week after my date with Ryoma, I was in utter despair. He still hadn't replied to my text and I was beginning to worry that he didn't want anything to do with me anymore.

It was the third of January, though, and I had to suck up my misery, if only just for today.

Hopping on a bus, I turned my thought to the task ahead. Today was the ninth anniversary of my mother's death.

Arriving at the cemetery, I first bought a bouquet of beautiful pink and white plumerias, which used to be her favourites, and headed to my mother's grave.

After the ritual bathing of the tombstone and offering her the flowers, I put my hands together for praying.

It had pained me a lot, losing my mother at such a young age, but whenever I visited her grave, I always talked to her, telling her about my life, and it helped me feel just a little closer to her.

Today, I mostly talked about school and tennis and how my school's team was going to be winning the nationals but eventually, inevitably, my thoughts turned to Ryoma. I talked about him a lot, and I thought my mother up in heaven would surely be getting bored by the time I finished, but I couldn't help myself. I needed to vent, and this was the only place I could do it.

When I finally finished "talking" to my mom, I got up and began making my way out of the cemetery. I wasn't watching where I was going so I didn't notice the funeral that was taking place until I almost bumped into one of the mourners.

As I turned to apologize, I caught sight of the grave marker and my breath stopped. The words engraved onto it were:

_R.I.P_

_Echizen Ryoma_

_Beloved son of Echizen Nanjiroh and Echizen Rinko._

_1995-2011_


	4. Chapter 4

I read the words on the tombstone over and over, but no matter how many times I read it, the words didn't change.

I swayed a little, feeling as if I were about to faint. I put out a hand to steady myself, but accidentally disturbed one of the mourners.

When he turned to me, I couldn't help but gasp. This boy looked a lot like Ryoma, with his short, green-tinted hair and his amber eyes.

When he saw me, he looked confused. "I'm sorry, but I've never seen you before. Were you one of my brother's friends?"

"Brother?" I asked confusedly. Then, I remembered Ryoma telling me about his older brother once. "You're…Ryoga?" I asked uncertainly.

He nodded. "So you were one of his friends. It was good of you to show up."

I shook my head. "I-I didn't even know he had died," I said.

"You didn't know?" asked Ryoga.

I shook my head. "Ryoma and I, we only communicated through texts."

Finally, something seemed to click into place for him and a few tears ran down his cheeks. "So you're Akaya."

I was surprised. "You know about me?"

Ryoga just smiled shakily. "He was always talking about you," he said. Then, before I knew what was happening, he was bowing deeply to me. When he looked up, he said, "Thank you for keeping Ryoma company these past months. I've never seen him as happy as he was when talking to you."

I couldn't say anything to that. Instead, I asked something that had been bothering me for a while now, "W-why did he die?" I asked.

"He was born with a weak heart. He could never do any physical activities and as he grew older, it became worse. By the time he turned twelve, he was spending most of his time at the hospital."

I suddenly recalled on of the first texts he had sent me: _I don't have any friends, I am forever isolated from my peers._

So that was what it had meant.

"When did he die?" I asked.

Ryoga smiled sadly. "It was kind of amazing, in a sad way. He died at exactly midnight on Christmas day."

My eyes widened when I heard this and I began to shake.

Ryoga looked worried. "Are you okay, Akaya-san?" he asked.

I shook my head, tears spilling from my eyes. "I-it's all my fault. T-that day, Ryoma was with me. I-I didn't know that he was sick, and we were running around all day. It's all my fault!" I said, sinking to the ground, my arms wrapped around my torso, as if I were trying to hold myself together.

Not once, but twice now, someone I loved had died because of me.

As I rocked back and forth, Ryoga looked at me worriedly.

"It's not your fault," he said, as if trying to comfort me. "Ryoma didn't want to tell you because he didn't want you to feel sorry for him. If he was so worried about it, he wouldn't have left the hospital. Akaya? Listen to me!" he said, but I didn't acknowledge him. I was too busy wrapped up in my own grief and pain. "You were very important to him, Akaya-san! Ever since he first met you, he told us many times, that if he were to die, he wanted his phone to be buried with him. Akaya!"

But I completely ignored him. Standing up, I dashed through the cemetery, away from the funeral and to a secluded area. As I ran, images flashed in my mind of a time I had long ago forgotten. A time when I had gotten lost in a forest and had fallen into a lake. The face of the boy that had saved me flashed into my mind and I gasped. I recognised that face.

Finally, when I could run no more, I dropped to the floor underneath the umbrella of a weeping willow and cried my heart out. Ryoma had saved my life, and I had repaid him by ending his.

Automatically, robotically, my hand reached for my phone. Taking it out, I typed:

_I know I'm selfish, I know I'm terrible. You've given me so much, and yet, still I crave more. You taught me how to care; you taught me how to be kind; you showed me how to like someone; you taught me how to love; but there's one thing you didn't teach me and that's what hurts the most – you didn't teach me how to let go. I LOVE YOU!_

_-Akaya_

As I sat there watching the screen, I felt what was left of my heart tear into a million pieces. I knew that Ryoma would never reply, I knew he would never hold his phone again, and yet, I still waited patiently. For what, I wasn't sure; there was just a kind of expectance. Finally, I closed my phone and made to get up but suddenly, amazingly, my phone beeped again and I felt a shiver run down my spine.

I slowly opened the phone, as if scared it would break. The sender's number didn't show up on the screen and as I read the message, tears rolled down my cheeks.

_Let's make a photo album in our hearts of all the joyous times. And when times are hard, we can just open it up and look at it. A part of you has grown in me, together forever we shall be, never apart, maybe in distance, but not in the heart. This farewell isn't forever, it's just until we meet again._

These words gave me strength and got up. Wiped away my tears, I picked up the pieces of my heart and smiled a little. When next I met Ryoma, maybe I could get him to fix it for me.

_**The End**_

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SkyGem: Well, that's the end of that. I just want to thank you all so much for reading and reviewing, and please do leave one last review, hm? Oh, and before I forget, I just wanna thank I heart Manga and Anime because, even though she couldn't help me co-write this story, she did help me a lot when it came to planning the chapters and working out the little bugs in the story, so come on everybody, give her a round of applause! *fans cheer loudly* Once again, thank you everyone, and I hope to see you all again! *bows*.

P.S. In the last text, where it says: Let's make a photo album...look at it; I actually didn't come up with that, it's the English translation of a line from the song Kimi ni Okuru Uta by the Japanese singer Koike Teppi. I advise you all to listen to it, it's an awesome song!

P.P.S I'm so forgetful today XD. Anyways, I told you guys that this fic was based on a story, right? Well, the story's called "Txt Pals," and it's a tragic love story on the site www(dot)lovefatedestiny(dot)com.


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